Weak Dream: A view into yourself

 After much contemplation, I've finally grasped why I'm perpetually time-pressed.  I don't have goal. That's the reason. I realized it many times ago, and tried to fix it. I have written my goal many times, in Notion, in Plan, in Note of my life, in my Blog. I told myself that I overcame wasting time. But the problem is I never follow my goal.  I just realized it today because I've been learning about stock investment, even though I only have a month left before the IELTS test. I know making money isn't my main goal, but I don't understand why I'm spending all my afternoons on stocks instead of preparing for the IELTS. I even skipped makeup classes at school just to focus on stock investment.  Nah, knowing the problem, but to solve the problem is a different story. My ability to stick to a plan is pretty weak. I can manage it for only a day or two before going back to my usual habits.  Mentioned again follow the plan, one month ago, I told myself I have ...

 Perhaps, during 3 years of high school, many of you have uttered these words? Compete, refugee, hate, envy, etc.  Originally, my class was formed by many members. Each person has a different personality. That creates diversity in my class. But, because of the different personalities, and differences in finances, my class lost its sense of unity.  It is my class. Almost all members of my class are boys. But I don't know, I don't know why my class dives into many groups??? As a class monitor, I can't do anything. Today is the teachers' day, I told my class to clap their hands when teachers come in, but no one heard me. Today, the girls celebrate boys' day for my class. But they gave presents by group. I couldn't do anything. I didn't play with any groups in my class. I play with everyone. I tried to fulfill my responsibility as a class monitor. But I don't know if I was right. I know my class dives into groups for a long time. But I denied it. I said to e...

 I seem to lack luck when it comes to individual tests, consistently performing poorly. However, in team contests, my luck takes a positive turn. I vividly recall a recent math test where I randomly answered 30 questions and got them all wrong. Similarly, last year, my random selections led to a mere 2 out of 10, the lowest score in my class. While I recognize that scores don't solely determine success, low grades do limit my opportunities for success.  But in team contest (football as example), I won the first prize with my team, although I didn't do anything. Remember last year, I won the gold medal with my team too.  I hope in the future, I will be lucky to success too, like in any contest. If I won't have enough luck to success, I will success by my skills. A real man makes his own luck. Yeah, I have to improve my skills now to improve my luck.  Lately, I've been staying up late, not for studying or leisure, but for CODING! Engaged in an Arduino project focused o...

 Now, I understand what is unrequited love mean. Now, I understand the feeling of love someone, the most painful feeling, but people addicted it.  Falling in love can feel exciting, even exhilarating. Always think of that person 24/7. Spend all of the day just for look at her photos, re-read old messages she sent to me. I want to talk with her, I want to listen to her voice. But I don't know how I can have her. Always type message and then delete, because afraid texting too much will bother her. All the messages I sent to her were carefully filtered. Aww got damm. She didn't reply me. She just reaction. This make my heart broke.  She is in the next class to mine. Yet, I am confined to gazing at her from a distance, my heart aching with unspoken longing.  It hurts. It hurts a lot. It feels as if someone stabbed you in the chest and threw out your heart, leaving it out to rot. Every time after school, I deliberately stay a little longer in class, so I can pretend to me...

  I removed all social networks app (Facebook, Instagram, Tiktok) from my phone, so I don't have anything to entertain myself with. Today, I'm keep scrolling my phone, then I found shopee. I kept surf shopee for all evening.   I found anki vector on shopee. This made me remembered the time I lost my anki vector, laptop, smartphone. I regretted about it. Until now, I still regret. I borrowed 27 million dong from my parents to buy the laptop. I paid 4 million dong for the anki vector. My phone is free, but when I lost it, I didn't have any backup phone to "play" with the code. It's great, I haven't even paid off my parents' debt before I lost my things.  I consoled myself that I can have a better laptop and better EyeCare. I lost my phone, so I was free now, without concern about how to root Android and installed app. My first robot: Anki Vector, the company went bankrupt so they disabled the sever so my robot couldn't talk, so the robot became worth...

 I am 17, an unemployed graduate, preparing for the college entrance examination. So let me tell you how lonely I am.  I recharge for unlimited calls and talk to nobody. This lonely I am.  I have no friend circle, not even a single friend with whom I can talk. I have bff, but we sometimes talk. My best friend is a guy, also introverted and quiet like me. I'm living with my family including my parents and younger sister. But I don't share everything with our family, however I'm quite friendly with mom still there are some limitations.  I am an introvert so I'm not good at making friends. I use social media like insta and fb but I have no one with whom I can talk. Whenever I feel bored I just scroll them. I uninstalled my insta coz of my preparation. It wasted lots of time whenever I started scrolling reels. Scrolling alone.  However, I'm happy to be alone. Just sometimes I don't like it because I don't have anyone to share my feelings :0 ...

 Why Mi Band 4, not Mi Band 6,7,8? Because I just have Mi Band 4.  It is a long story (u can skip this)  Alright, I used to think about bought a new Mi Band when Mi Band 6 released, but I didn't have enough money. When Mi Band 7 released, I have enough money and bought it with 800k VND. But then someone bought my watch for 1300k so I sold it hehe. 500 thousand VND profit, I use it for other things. In the end, I only used Mi Band 7 by watching reviewers video on Youtube. I found the Mi Band 7 very cool and wanted to have it, because wearing it was cooler than the Mi Band 4. I once regretted selling my new watch. So much so that for a long time I didn't use the Mi Band 4 anymore because I think it was stupid. I realized that if I had bought it, I wouldn't have wasted my time watching this damn video. So I decided to bought Mi Band 8 when it released. I watch many damn reviewers video, and I released why I have to pay money just for the cooler watch and just ...